When you hit that wall, I think that’s a sign something needs to change. We all have a routine right? So what happens when we do that routine too long? We become robotic. I had one of these funks a while back, and started climbing with some new friends I had met that lived in the same apartment complex. I had done some small rock climbing a couple times when I was really young, but never got into bouldering, so I tried it out. That day was a great time, and it was refreshing. I don’t get to climb as often as I’d like, but it’s always a nice change and almost a breath of fresh air because it broke my norm. It’s also a good idea to change up who you hang out with. Not saying your “people” are causing you to feel this way (unless they are, then you need to reassess your groups entirely), but it’s good to rotate who you hang out with to get fresh perspectives and different experiences.

Break the norm. That’s the key. Get out of your normal routine, do something that you’re not sure you would do normally. Does it seem a little scary? Never done it before? Try it. Worst case scenario, you’re in the same place you were before if you don’t like it. Throw some spice into the mix, make yourself uncomfortable. You think the people living the life you want just fell into it? They took the leap from who they were to what they wanted to be. Sometimes you can’t see where you’re going until you’ve crossed to the other side.

Whether you believe in the traditional holy ‘faith’ or not, have faith in yourself. No one knows you better than you. Have faith in you to go out and do someting different instead of being another one who says “I”m gonna do…” or “oh yeah I’m thinking I’m gonna do this soon.” Right…

If what you’re currently doing isn’t working, why wouldn’t you change things up? Like with a lot of things, what if it actually does work? I think you’ll even have a little fun if you add a little sump’n sump’n. Try to take that leap, and mix some shit up.

On the podcast, we talk a lot about having our ‘pockets of peace,’ a lesson taken from Aubrey Marcus, founder of Onnit. Your pocket of peace is a place you go to or a thing you do where it’s only you, and it’s all about you. For some people this might be the gym, playing a sport, yoga, boxing, creating art, going for a drive, video games, etc. Everyone needs to have their ‘thing’ that helps them escape for a while in order to stay sane lol. When you’re having a bad day, or even when you’re having a good day, you need those things in your life that keep you grounded. It’s ok (and actually necessary) to take time to yourself to just have some ‘you’ time. With how busy life gets, surrounded by something or someone all the time, it’s good to quiet everything down and enter your pocket of peace.

When you’re in your pocket of peace, you’re not working or worrying about anything except what you’re doing at that exact moment. You’re 100% present. This is your time to release, let it go, and get back to baseline. We’ve said before that you need something to look forward to every single day, and your pocket of peace can fulfill more than just one daily benefit.

You can literally do anything with them.

You can do your traditional movements like a squat, any presses, and deadlift, but you can also use them to be diverse and more functional. Put it upside and do a single arm shoulder press to challenge shoulder and scapular stability. Do single kettlebell cleans, farmer’s walks, lunges, RDL’s, rows, Turkish Get-Ups, swings, rotational work, the list goes on.

You can be effective with less.

If you don’t have time to get to your gym, go through all the motions and get your full routine in, you can get a solid KB workout in 30 minutes or less. I’ve even read and programmed workouts that are 20 minutes or less. You can combine different movements with a mix of strength and functionality, but still get that heart rate up. This is where you might do a few rounds of a super, triple, or even quadruple set depending on your time and availability.

They’re fun.

If you get tired of the same old machines and movements, first of all change up your programming. But KB’s spice things up a bit. They’re a different type of weight with different forms and techniques for various movements. Using KB’s requires a different type of skill, so it’s fun trying to get good at a new movement or weight and keeps things interesting.

Your strength in your other lifts may increase.

Using them can add a nice change-up to your program, but you might notice your strength go up in your other lifts from using different muscles in different ways and planes of motion with the KB’s. When you train in different planes of motion and challenge muscles in different ways than they’re used to, it’s very likely that you’ll see an increase in gains with your other traditional lifts. Better function, range of motion, and strength in all different movements can only help your body in all other facets. You want to be efficient and effective with any and all movements, not just one. Your body will thank you when you get old.

Some of the tricks I use or things I look for may seem a bit more obvious, but good to review nonetheless.

First off, try to pick a restaurant that has a variety of options or something that you know could be a little healthier than a fast food place or something similar. For example, Chipotle is a much better option than McDonald’s or a breakfast sandwich from a Starbucks with who knows what in it. Now, don’t be getting double sour cream and cheese/queso all over your chipotle, that kind of defeats the purpose.

Now if you’re going to a bit nicer sit-down place, then get on Yelp and see what’s around in whatever city you’re in, and cruise through the menus. Find something that has a wide variety, where the people you’re going to be with will have plenty of options to choose from. They may not want to be as healthy as you.

When eating out, avoid fried foods, sodas, and things that are simply soul food. There are times when it’s good to feed the soul and just enjoy yourself without worrying about it, but if you’re going out frequently due to your job/lifestyle, then you need to pick and choose your battles. Don’t always resort to the loaded up burger and fries. Look for a quality protein source, maybe a solid carb if you’re a bit low that day (rice, rice pilaf, couscous, quinoa, etc.) and some type of side veggie if they have it. A side of broccoli, veggies and hummus, side salad (and not one that’s all iceberg lettuce covered in Ranch).

If you look through the menu, find the red flags that jump out to you, then you have a better idea of what you’re going to go with. A Po’ Boy might not be as healthy as a fish of the day over a bed of rice and side of seasonal veggies. Again, pick and choose your battles, but you need to be more conscientious if you eat out frequently.

One easy solution is to go for a run. Running doesn’t require a gym or particular location. But if you’re also trying to work the muscles a bit more, don’t forget about the power of bands. I’m a big advocate of resistance bands and therabands. One because I use them a lot in the rehab space, but it can also get you by in the short term to still help send muscle building signals to the body. They’re also ideal if recovering from an injury. It is a good way to progressively load appropriately.

If you’re on a trip with little to no gym access, then you can use bodyweight exercises and/or bands. Even if you do a quick 10-20 minutes, getting a light pump will help still send that muscle building signal. That good blood flow can also help facilitate recovery. But if you’re stuck without a full gym or with limited time, this is where you would want to do more of a circuit routine with minimal rest. You might also do supersets of some sort with your bands as well. Below is a list of ideas to help you get started on how to still get a good workout with just your bodyweight and some bands.

With Bands:

• Step on one end of the band with one foot and can do bicep curls (can use different angles as well), tricep presses, or tricep kickbacks
• Place band against your back, then grab either side with your hands and press forward to mimic a chest press
• Standing, you can do reverse flys or can stand on band with both feet and do shoulder presses. - - Can also do this one leg/arm at a time for presses if worried about too much tension on the band standing with both feet about hip width apart on the band, grab each end at your desired tension. Squat down, then when you come back up, you will feel the tension from the band. So you will have to get a short grab initially to feel the tension from the band.
• Seated, you can wrap the band around a post, shelving unit, hinge in a door, and can do various types of rows. Can also do seated shoulder work as well in this position

Bodyweight:

• Run
• Push-ups (do varying kinds: triangle with hands, isometric holds at bottom, extremely slow down and up, angle with feet up on a bed or chair)
• Squats (can do jump squats, isometric holds at bottom, very slow down and up)
• Get into a position that mimics a Downward Dog, angle hands so fingertips face each other, and go down nose towards hands and press back up. This will work your shoulders.
• Lunges (helps work core, overall balance and stability)
• Sissy squats
• Toe raises for calves (reps, isometric holds, slow reps)

Hopefully this list of exercises is helpful to at least get your mind thinking of how to tweak a full body exercise routine if you don’t have much time and/or space. This will get the blood moving throughout the body, you can have minimal rest to get your heart rate up, and you’ll still get positive benefits from moving and working out. This might also be a good time to work on more mobility, flexibility, and proper movement patterns. You can feel different things without as much load or can take this time to work in other areas that you might not take your fitness to as much.

Confidence

Walk like you know where you are going. Mean what you say. When people see you follow through on the things you believe in, they will follow your actions.

Discipline

When you face a tough, unanticipated situation, how do you react? Emotionally intelligent people know that it takes awareness and restraint not to let negative emotions take over in these moments. Positive leaders look at adverse events as a challenge to overcome and accomplish, rather than a threat to success.

Leadership

What are the motivations of those around you? Please make an effort to find out the personal goals of your team members, and do what you can to support and guide them to their destination. They will face challenges themselves and lean on you in moments of struggle, desperation, and negativity.

Enjoyment

Positive people have an aura about them that communicates gratitude and happiness for what the day brings. How you approach your work and conversations with people will spread like a ripple effect.

Gratitude

Write down three things you are thankful for each morning. It prevents you from starting the day off on the wrong foot. This gratitude practice then also radiates in the way you carry yourself for the rest of the day. Congratulate yourself on completing the small tasks throughout the day. People will see you do this, and then they can find happiness in the same way.

With any coach, boss, manager, doctor, or even your average cube worker, you need to make decisions. Sometimes these decisions have more weight than others, and sometimes they need to be fast without much time to think about it. You need to become a professional decision maker. If you’re in a role that requires you making decisions frequently, then you need to become good at it.

If you’re indecisive, you can start practicing this through small actions. When you’re going out with friends or somewhere that requires a group to call a Lyft/Uber, then be the one who says you’ll just get it. Don’t play the game where everyone pauses, waits to see who will do it then everyone else easily Venmo. Everyone pitches in, just call the damn ride. Pick the restaurant or bar. If someone doesn’t like it, then ask them for suggestions, but make a call and that at least gets the discussion going rather than the universal “doesn’t matter to me” or “ahh I don’t really care, anywhere is fine.”

Fear of being wrong? Don’t be, because it’s going to happen. You’re not going to shoot 100% with your judgment calls. Some decisions will be wrong, cost money and/or time, upset someone. That’s just the way it is, so expect those things to happen from time to time, but that’s how you become a better decision maker. You’ll never, ever be perfect, so accept that and focus on doing better with each call you make. Get better at evaluating situations from all angles and weighing all possible solutions.

Take control and make things happen. Not making a decision is worse than making the wrong decision.

First of all, don’t let food stress you out so much. It’s the holidays, you’re going to have good times, with good company, and good food and drink. Let yourself relax and do just that. If you’re worried about gaining too much weight over the holiday season, or having a lack of control, I’ve provided a few tips to help mitigate your stress and concern.

1) Eat foods in order.
- Protein
- Veggies
- Carbs

Doing this will actually fill you up better in terms of satiety but also nutritionally. We all love our mashed potatoes and stuffing (guilty as charged) but protein is actually the most satiating macro. Have a good amount of your proteins and veggies, then go and get your carb on.

2) Eat slowly and be mindful.

Ever notice as you’re chewing your current bite, you have your fork already loaded up for the next? Slow down and be mindful (or present) when you’re eating, especially when you’re with friends and family. Eating slower will also help you feel fuller faster, and have better digestion.

*3) Pick the dessert(s) that are the most meaningful. *

Just because it’s there, doesn’t mean you have to eat it. If there’s generic desserts that you can get any other day in the week, then maybe skip those. Pick the desserts that you have once a year, not just a cookie or store-bought cheesecake. Eat what will give you a mouthwatering experience that may even take you back to grandma’s house.

Also, the amount of weight gains in pounds between Thanksgiving and New Years…1. That’s right, only 1 pound. Now, that’s not giving you the green light to stuff your face and eat everything in sight just because it’s there. Just relax, enjoy your time with family and friends, and enjoy everything else that is brought together by the food.

So I had to learn a little more about light LOL. Sunlight contains red, yellow, green and blue light rays, each with varying degrees of wavelength and energy. The red light rays have longer wavelengths and thus less energy, and the spectrum of light just beyond red is infared. THey’re invisible rays but still warming (think of the heat lamps at the restaurant keeping your food warm).

The blue light tends to have the shortest wavelength, yet the strongest energy. Where blue light rests the most is in device screens (computer, TV, phone, etc.) that we’re all on all day, every day. The eye is capable of blocking UV rays from reaching the retina, which is light sensitive, but the eye is not as good at blocking blue light as all of it passes through the cornea and to the retina. Too much blue light exposure may lead to macular degeneration and could eventually damage your vision. If you are able to block a good amount of this blue light with special glasses while using devices or watching TV, then you could be doing yourself a world of good for your eyes. No, they won’t change the way you see things and yes they are still quite fashionable and most people can’t even tell a difference that they might not be traditional glasses.

Save your eyes, it’s cool to see stuff.

If you’re in a job you don’t like and have an idea for your own business, yes it’s scary with lots of risk. Start with making peace with the job you hate. Easier said than done, but let yourself know that it’s not a long term position for you. If you’re in this place then you’ve understood that you’re meant for more in this life. Use the full-time job to fuel your side hustle until the side hustle can replace the income of your current job. It may be faster or longer than you expect, so be ok with either, especially if it’s longer. Try to not take your work home with you and let yourself leave it all there.

Doing this will allow you to keep the lights on, but will also let you start doing the thing(s) you really love and actually want to do. When you start working on your true passions, more money than you were making before will eventually come. Putting that high-powered energy towards your desirous work will make it 10x easier to work, and the work will be that much better. Allow yourself to do what you want to do and be happy. It’s hard when you’re in a position you hate, but make peace with it and start doing what you really want to do.

Here are the most crucial takeaways from the book. These concepts have greatly impacted the way I connect with people in my job, and in life:

1. The most important word to someone happens to be their own name. Any spoken message carries a greater meaning when a specific name is attached to it. I have used this concept in my sales presentations, and I find people are more engaged and influenced by what I am saying.

2. There will always be someone that is knowledgeable about something you are not. If you are eager to find that passion in other people and let them talk to you about it, they will enjoy your company... and you will learn new information in the process.

3. T*he ability to think in terms of the other person's point of view will always serve you well in any professional capacity*. The other person needs to know that you consider their feelings as important. This will build trust with the person, and they will open up to you.

4. Praising the someone's slightest improvement will inspire them to maximize their own unique skills and treasures. The more confidence you place in other people, the greater effect of your own influence.

I would recommend this book to anyone who is trying to get ahead of life or improve his or her own emotional intelligence.

How are you doing with everything in your life? Meditate and check yourself to recharge and see how you’re feeling with all the things you have going on. With all the people, things, screens that can keep us distracted, it’s good to unplug. Try to do this at least a couple times per week if you can. If you don’t live alone, maybe you enjoy the gym, an art class, working on your car/bike, going on hikes, etc. Whatever it may be, make sure you have your own escapes, or ‘Pockets of Peace’ as Aubrey Marcus would call them.

You can’t pour from an empty cup. Even spending time with family and friends and all the fun things take energy. Not saying there’s anything wrong with those things, but it’s just good to say ‘no’ every once in a while and take some time to yourself.

Hang with yourself, you should be a fun time anyway!

Most of the consumable soy nowadays is genetically modified. I’m sure you’ve seen things labeled as ‘Non-GMO.’ The soy in most consumable products (soybean oil, soymilk, meat substitutes, tofu, and many processed foods) these days are the exact opposite of that. Soy is a genetically modified substance.

Now the problem with too much soy is that it could cause to the increase of estrogen. The genetically modified soy contains what are called, ‘phytoestrogens.’ Now, these phytoestrogens act as estrogen, but they merely mimic that of naturally produced estrogen. This could potentially cause a hormonal imbalance in either men or women. In women, however, higher estrogen levels could possibly be linked to increased risk for breast and cervical cancer. The GMO product is also harmful to the gut, as it can kill off the good bacteria.

If you see ‘soy lecithin,’ however, that is actually something ok to consume. Soy lecithin is extracted from soybeans, cottonseed, sunflower, and milk to name a few. It has the ability to emulsify fats to make it ideal and easier for digestion. It is seen in processed foods, medicines, and supplements so that it can provide a uniform appeal, especially if some things don’t mix well together naturally, such as oil and water for example.

Now, there are some benefits to soy, such as reducing total and LDL cholesterol. There are mixed studies of reduction in the risk of heart disease, while others do not. However, you’ll want to make sure you get organic, fermented soy, as it will not have been genetically modified and will have maintained its nutrients for said health benefits.

I personally try to stay away from soy, but as with anything, conduct your own research and make a sound stance either way, but I hope I was able to shed light in a positive direction on what I think to be true.

If you’re already in a high stress environment, then adding a high intensity workout may actually be detrimental to you. Some people get stuck in that “fight or flight” or sympathetic response all day every day, which is problematic. The opposite being the “rest and digest” or parasympathetic response. This is when we’re much calmer, not feeling that go, go, go mentality, and have a lower stress environment.

So we have all this extra stress, and yes the workouts may be helping you manage or cope with things, but we need to be strategic. With more stress, you want to put less on the body to yield a good response because at a certain point, adding stress on top of stress is doing more harm than good. So if you’re having a high stress day, maybe just go on a walk or lighter jog. You could still weight train, but a lot lighter than normal. You’re not going to be PR’ing that day. Do a lighter lift, stretch longer, work on mobility and range of motion. Longer stretches and holds can also calm the central nervous system back down, as it’s giving the body the relax and lengthen response. It’s not getting ready to do work.

When you have the high stress days and still need that workout, go in with the objective of coming out lighter. Release the stress, but let’s work on doing it properly rather than hammering ourselves into the ground. It may be a badge of honor to always go as hard as you can, but that’s not going to serve your body well long term. Let’s be nice to ourselves, because that’s an OK thing to do.

But after a while, you start to realize your new routine isn't as enjoyable as what you had before. You don't know anyone and you're struggling to make new friends. This is when relocation depression starts to set in, and it starts to feel like you will never be as happy as what you once were. This is a common feeling that a lot of recent graduates face or faced, including myself.

At first, I struggled to create the same amount of happiness that I was experiencing in college. I knew I had to change what I was doing. Here are the 4 small tweaks I made that completely changed my daily mood and overall happiness in life:

I Introduced Familiarity in My Life

When you first move to a new city or area, a lot of things feel different because your schedule changes. But that doesn't mean you have to get rid of the activities and happy reminders that you have always enjoyed your entire life. Keeping pictures of family, friends, and great memories around your house or apartment give you a daily reminder of the great people you have in your life. Budget time in your day and week for the enjoyable activities you did in your old living situation. For me, it was working out and playing basketball, reading, and cooking. I set aside time to FaceTime or call my friends and family. Keeping these things consistent made me feel like I wasn't missing out on anything from my "old life."

I Took Care of My Body and Mind

The start of your career can take a lot out of you mentally. When you get home, you want to relax and not worry about exerting any more energy than you already have for the day. While it is good to recharge and relax, too much of this can gradually drag you away from physical exercise. Make it a point to budget 30 minutes of physical activity in your day. Whether that's a walk outside, taking a run, playing a sport, or joining a gym. Studies show that daily physical exercise decreases your chance for depression. I also made sure to allow 15-30 minutes per day of some type of mental stimulation. For me, this meant reading a book, article, or magazine, completing a puzzle or mental exercise, or meditation. Even an intelligent conversation with another person can qualify for mental stimulation.

I Wrote in My "Gratitude Journal" Every Morning

When you first move to a new location and start to feel down, it's easy to quickly focus on what you don't have in your life anymore. Instead, reflect on the positive things that you have and get to experience everyday. Writing these things down in the morning makes it even more real, and you suddenly are in a better mood to start out each day. For me, I was always writing about my friends and family, my God-given gifts, the roof over my head, food, clean water… simple things that I know a lot of people on this earth actually don't have.

Join an Extracurricular Group at Work or In Your Community

There are extracurricular activities everywhere you look… just keep your eyes open! There is likely a young professionals group at your company or in your city. These are set up recent graduates like yourself together and participate in fun activities in the community. Also be on the lookout for company or department emails with opportunities for networking. These are never a bad idea to attend because you don't necessarily need to talk with everybody there. If you can get one meaningful conversation out of a work-related event, that is a success. Other opportunities include intramural signups, fantasy sports signups, or holiday parties.

My first question in response is typically, “Well what do you do in your free time that you enjoy doing, and don’t get paid for?” And no, sleep and that kinda shit doesn’t count. Actually think about an activity you enjoy doing that makes you feel good, maybe puts you in a better mood. Maybe it’s hiking, drawing, writing, cricket, even reading! Find that thing. If you don’t have one yet, that’s ok, just go try some things that sound a little intriguing to you. It’s not going to make you comfortable, so accept that or you’ll never grow.

No matter what it is, make sure that’s a part of a daily or weekly routine, depending whatever it may be. If you’re looking to monetize what you love doing, there’s always options to make money too, it’s just figuring out what value you can provide with it. Anything can be monetized with the internet these days, it’s just finding out what you’re into and good at.

Go do something you’ve always wanted to. If you don’t like it, what’s the worst that happens? You’re in the same place you already are, but tried something instead? Don’t do the, “I’m gonna do this soon” or any of that. Those people never do it. Don’t even tell anyone, just go and see what happens. You might feel really good afterwards, maybe even more empowered. Everyone needs their thing that gives them a little more inner peace to keep them grounded. Keep doing what you love, and make sure it adds that positive vibe to your day.

You’ll never find out if you don’t try.

I was guilty of it too. I worked hard and prided myself in being able to kill myself and others via my programming and try to get sore again after my body would adapt. Is that really the goal? What if there’s already a lot of other stress on the body? Then your overtraining is doing more harm to you than any amount of good. I would recommend introducing frequency training, as it has been shown to yield better muscle building responses than training a muscle so that it becomes so sore, that you don’t train it again for a week. Train it a little lighter in terms of intensity, break up muscle groups throughout the week, and hit each group 2-3 times per week. Allow yourself days off, or lighter active recovery days. You’ll feel better after your workouts, energized, ready for the next thing. You don’t want to always feel like absolute death after you’re done training.

Being that sore could actually be a strong indicator that you have over trained that particular muscle group. Not being able to walk normally, lift your arms to a normal height, etc…that’s not fun. No one enjoys having less mobility due to something they did in order to make them ‘healthier.’ You more than likely overworked and need to focus on recovery more than hammering the next muscle group to death.

Rather, think about what the goals are that you’re going into the gym with. Why are you there? Don’t focus on killing yourself and trying to get to the point of almost throwing up or unable to walk or move, because you don’t need to. Yes, you need to train hard to get the results you want, but allow yourself to be able to do everyday life without an issue lol. Start with stopping 2-3 reps short of failure (failure meaning fatigued to the point of breaking form), and see if you don’t notice a difference in the way you feel.

Enjoy your workout, bring down the intensity, and focus on moving correctly with strong connection throughout the body and “level up” at your own pace. Do things right, then you’ll be able to do them forever.

Towel and Cold Water Method:

In Tim Ferriss' Tribe of Mentors book, Ben Stiller talks about dipping his head in a bucket of cold water to start the day. While this is extreme, I find my method a little more practical. The night before, fill an insulated water bottle with cold water and ice. Place the bottle and a dry towel on your nightstand, or within reach of your bed. When the morning comes, dip the towel in water, rub it on your face, and BOOM! You are ready to tackle your day.

Warm Water with Lemon:

Last time I checked, you aren't drinking any fluids while you are asleep. When your body goes anywhere from 6-10 of sleeping hours without drinking, you will be dehydrated when you wake up. When the alarm sounds, it is important to have a drink ready at your finger tips. Water with lemon is one of the best things you can drink to help give you that mental boost you need to start the day. Lemon contains 187% of your daily value of Vitamin C, which aids in enzyme function and liver detox. Ingesting this and chugging more water will instantly provide you a great amount of energy at the onset of the day.

Natural Light Exposure:

One of the best things you can do to aid your wakeup is to introduce yourself to sunlight as early as possible. Natural light increases the amount of serotonin in your body, which is a neurotransmitter that regulates your mood and sleep. Serotonin is often referred to as the "happy chemical" because high levels contribute to positive mood and social well-being. Having high levels of this will allow you to head into your day with a positive and alert mindset. It is also a precursor to melatonin, which winds you down and helps you sleep. After 12 hours, serotonin is converted to melatonin. Natural light will be a difference maker the earlier you expose yourself to it. I actually sleep with my blinds open, so that I can wake up to the sunlight.

Incorporating these strategies into your morning routine takes little effort, but the results will be impactful. Not only will you be more awake, but you will have a happier mood as you begin the day and go out and change the world. Good luck!

Consequently, this hesitation greatly reduces our ability to form new alliances and expand our network of key contacts. We have the ability to create success and opportunities for ourselves, depending on how often we take a step outside of our comfort zone and approach someone for the first time. How can we overcome this?

Everyone is trying to accomplish something higher than themselves. Everyone is still making the effort to live out their lives because there is at least one aspect of their life that is important to them and gives them energy and motivation to keep on living.

Find that thing. Find all of those things in everyone you meet. The more you ask about, and listen to, the things that people treasure most, the quicker you get to their heart, and the more you earn their trust.

Find out what people are trying to accomplish, and use your skills, values, and strengths to help that person reach a higher level of living. That way, they can strengthen that bond with that important part of their life that they value so much.

Today, whenever I approach a person for the first time, whether it’s a sales prospect, a random person, or even someone I already know, I know that there are 4 things I can ask about that will automatically strengthen the bond and trust I have with that given person:

Family

Who is important in this person's life? What role do these people play? Is the person married or have parents, have kids, grandkids, siblings or nieces and nephews? If you ask a classroom who the biggest mentor is in each of their lives, 90% will say parents or some family member. Even if this person has no family members they are close with, they at least have a close friend or someone they confide in emotionally. Talking about this will definitely break the ice.

Occupation

Most people work 40 hours a week, so their job is a big part of what they spend their time on. But the most important thing to figure out here: do they actually enjoy it or not? Does it provide them positive energy? What impact has the job made on this person's attitude and outlook on life - find out both the good and the bad. Sometimes if a person is struggling with depression because of their job, having someone like you to talk with could really allow you to develop a deep relationship with this person.

Recreation

Outside of work and family, what does this person like to spend their time doing? Are they active and like to play sports or workout? Do they enjoy learning or studying different topics outside the scope of their job? Find out their hobbies - this can allow you to possibly connect on something and spend more time with this person.

Dream

Your goal here is to find out if there is anything this person is working toward that is greater and higher than himself or herself. Is this person looking to advance at work and earn a promotion? Start a business? Lose weight and become healthier? Use what people say here and cater your skills and capabilities to help them achieve something they don't have currently.

Yeah you read that right. We don’t exercise patience as much as I think we should. Make it ok to wait on things. Ironically, I’m currently waiting for my oil change as I sit and type this. Try to make dead waiting time like this productive or enjoyable. If you are going somewhere where you can expect a wait, plan ahead so you don’t get angry and frustrated when you have to wait for SO LONG.

If you can even do some work on your phone like email, do those things while you’re waiting (something you rather not do) and knock out some small stuff during that time. You could even read a book…I think we’ve gotten away from that a bit.You’ll feel much more productive afterwards, and if you hate looking through your emails, you don’t have to do that at home when you could be relaxing instead. You got that done while you were waiting.

Doctor office, getting your car worked on, waiting in line somewhere, on your way to and from work (if you’re not driving of course), in the airport. These are all places where you can change some dead waiting frustrating space into productive time that you might even end up enjoying. Don’t get so upset with waiting or angry that they’re not getting to YOU fast enough. Try to change the game. You can’t always change the environment, so change the approach and what you’re doing within that environment.

photo: @jontyson, https://unsplash.com/photos/ZN5psu3lNNs?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText

But the commercial wasn't about the app, it was about the why behind the app. The narrator explains how a young kid wishes his dad had a job closer to home, instead of an hour away.

The commercial flashes to the dad using the indeed app, finding a job that is close to home explaining how the young son's wish is answered.

Indeed.com accomplished something key when it comes to influence - people don't buy the thing, the product, the what… they buy the why. Someone viewing that commercial knows that they can strengthen the bond within their family by using the indeed app, which finds jobs anywhere and everywhere. I see this marketing campaign boosting the monthly users for the app.

If you are selling anything, start with why.

If that means communicating your personal brand in an effective way, start with your why.

• Why are you the way you are? 
• Why do your positive qualities and attributes allow you to grow to where you are now? 
• Why do you help people and make them happier?

Know these "why's" and let it shine through your daily persona.

If that means communicating your vision to someone, start with the why.

• Why does the other person's life benefit from what you are telling them or offering them?
• Why will this person trust you more because of the conversation you had with them?

Apply more "why" into your positive thinking. It allows you to appreciate things more and inspire others to dream and pursue a more worthwhile life.

So, easier said than done of course. A few small things to think about or take into consideration:

• If you’re in an apartment building or house, allow yourself at least 5 minutes to get from your door to your vehicle.

• You might double check something, forget to fill your water bottle, forget to lock a door, elevator was slow. Whatever those small things are that still take time, allow for those.

• If you’re parking in a garage at work, know how long it takes you to get from your vehicle to your physical desk.

• If you’re going somewhere you’re not as familiar with, allow time to find parking and walk if necessary.

• Know how long you realistically need to get ready for whatever event it is. Getting ready to just chill at a friend’s house or out for dinner, show, wedding, etc. Know yourself and tendencies, then just allow that extra time.

It’s not easy, I know it’s easy to say. If you’re really struggling, just start by adding 30 minutes to your time to get ready. Getting up early isn’t easy either, but make sleep a priority, and then you’ll enjoy it much more. I know I’m still struggling with prioritizing enough sleep, but it’s so critical and will be a gamechanger for you every single day.

Baby step it, it won’t change overnight. Do the small things, one at a time. You’ll get there, you just have to stay self-disciplined. Start small, and get the small wins.

Don’t try to tackle Everest off the bat. Get the smaller victories first. Whether you’re just starting out, or getting back from being off a couple weeks, start small. Get 2-3 days in, don’t take intensity to high, and make sure you’re not getting sore to the point where you can’t move. Get your mojo back and start with being consistent. When you can maintain a good workout routine and get to the point of enjoyment and good habit, then you can determine what more you can add to fit your lifestyle.

When you’re just starting out, don’t worry about what everyone else is doing. Just start with a solid routine which is realistic to maintain within your weekly lifestyle. Get to the point to where you enjoy that time in your day. Try different things, seek help if needed, research things, but don’t try to overcomplicate it. Make sure you create good, proper skills with foundational movements such as the deadlift, squat, chest and shoulder presses. But create a sense of consistency. That’s when you notice results.

Start small. Try full body workouts 2-3 times per week and go from there. Make sure you have foundational movements in there, but also make sure you’re enjoying it. For it to be a true lifestyle change, you can’t hate it. Yes, it will be hard, and at times you won’t want to go, and like anything, it will test you. But that’s the beautiful part that comes with it, it still has its mental pieces that come with it. Physically and mentally challenge and improve yourself. Strengthen those areas and it will benefit many other parts of your life.

Start small and consistent.

The power in the future belongs to the best communicators. Ambiguous communicators in today's business world represent an expense.

Make yourself clearer, and people will perceive you as an expert. You will find that as you condense what you are saying into deliberate statements, you will be less likely to stutter or repeat unnecessary information.

Those who can express themselves in words that cannot be misunderstood will have immense value in today's fast, technological world.

This comment made me feel good, but I found it very interesting. I had spent about an hour with him, shadowing what he does, as part of my sales training. And I think I may have said about 2 facts about myself. The rest… were meaningful questions I asked about his life. He probably did about 95% of the talking.

Listening… makes you captivating.

I have found that when you talk to someone about themselves, they will listen to you for hours.

It is important to share meaningful things about yourself. You will find, however, that you will become more memorable to people when you regard them as important, and show genuine interest in what they love to talk about. Train yourself to be more interested in hearing their stories, than they are telling them.

The energy you invest in people through listening will create a unique bond. You can meet a person and establish a deep connection by just taking the time to listen, and listening actively.

A flashy Lamborghini zooming past you, a large mansion that catches your eye when you're driving down the road, someone in the gym who is bigger and stronger than you, a person with wealth and status that you aspire to be. You want these things. You want them right now. You'll do whatever you can to get yourself closer to these things, without mapping out a process that you will enjoy navigating.

When you see these people, however, it is only the top of the iceberg. These are the material results that only people at the surface level can see. What you cannot see is everything below the water: the insecurities like the pain, the lack of fulfillment, and any baggage that person may be carrying on their path to wealth or success.

It is best not to draw motivation or pay too much attention to the material successes we see of other people. Instead, focus on your own process and the joy that it brings you. You will often find that if you chase money, success, and the material things alone, you will wonder why it made you happy in the first place when you get there. This will leave you searching to fill the void that is still within you.

Do what you love. Ask others what made them happy in their QUEST and JOURNEY to reaching their success. Instead of comparing what you have to what others have, find inspiration from different people and implement it into your own recipe for success.

Find your passions and what gives you life every day. Allocate your time and effort to these things and the happiness that you can bring to other people in the process. The rest will come.

I’ve always been a people pleaser. To this day, I don’t want to let anyone down, especially my family and closest friends. However, my journey and your journey is not anyone else’s journey. Words still hurt. But what does that say about them? What about the courage you showed by taking that chance on yourself and saying “I deserve better.” Take the wheel and put the pedal to the floor.

When Tim and I started on this podcast journey, we listed out the things people were going to hate us for first. We say openly that we’re not doctors or on any high horse, and that we’re just out to share our stories and hopefully connect with others and provide value. We know people will knock us because we’re in our mid 20s and we haven’t necessarily “made it” yet. We don’t have a “professional” degree and how do we know this and that and who are we do give insights on things that some may think we have no room to talk on?

True.

But we have and never will talk on things we don’t know about, won’t pretend, and will just share our own stories and insights and experiences based on those. We hope to connect with others and provide value through what we do, and we thank you for giving us a chance.

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.”

No matter what your circumstance, good or bad, you can use this to better yourself and increase your value to other people. All the negatives and positives in our lives, mixed together, make us who we are. And the beauty of life is that there is no single pathway to success. You can forge that by winning two things:
• Understanding yourself and where you want to go (private victory)
• Ability to connect with people and understand their motivations (public victory)

Both make up healthy emotional intelligence. If you can understand yourself and are able to effectively self-regulate your emotions, you have won half the battle. If you can see things from other people’s point of view and feel what they are feeling, you have won the other half.

Putting these together in a unique way that serves your personality and strengths is what contributes to your personal brand, and how you can adapt to a dynamic world with expanding industries and technology.

Private Victory

Before you can go out and win relationships with other people, having the blueprint down is crucial. Begin with the end in mind, and write down the ideal person you want to become or what you want to accomplish. Maybe it’s being successful in your career or job, maybe it’s having more money, maybe it’s improving your interpersonal skills. Write it down somewhere, in detail, and look at it every day.

Next, be proactive, which includes waking up each day with the gratitude that you are alive and have responsibility over your day to win it, and make it a version that is successful for you. Put first things first – list out the activities that make you closer to your goal, and the activities that you could spend less time on. Leave some time for activities that bring you pleasure and satisfaction for achieving the things you do. But, budget your time in an effective manner that gets you once step closer to the goal that is written down for you.

Public Victory

In all your interactions each day, ask yourself
• Did this person feel better about themselves because they were with me?
• Did this conversation create a unique experience to look back on at the end of the day?

People will like you if you make them feel important. There are many ways to do that:
• Ask them about and talk about things they treasure the most
• Remember their names and call them by it
• Ask them about specific things they have previously talked about.

Taking a personal stake in someone else’s success will make them feel motivated to talk to you and return the favor. Seeing people not as they are, but what they are capable of becoming, will improve that person, and they will see it. Doing this instills in them a belief that being around you makes them a better person.
I know remembering names and facts about people is tough, especially when you talk to a lot of people each day – write this down!

This is what the notes section on the iPhone is for. Taking 10 seconds to do this after each conversation will yield more value than you could imagine.

The unique way you approach the private and public victory is what contributes to your personal brand. Take steps every day to bring yourself closer to realizing the vision you have set for yourself. Take steps every day to win each of your reactions with people. When your name comes up, how will people feel about you?

• Approximately 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. experience mental illness in a given year
• Approximately 1 in 25 adults in the U.S. experience a severe mental illness in a given year that substantially interferes with or limits one or more major life activities
• Approximately 1 in 5 youth aged 13-18 (~21%) experience a severe mental disorder at some point during their life. For children aged 8-15, the estimate is 13%

Currently, the millennial generation is experiencing an increasing number of those with anxiety and/or depression. These issues stem from personal/love life, life at home, rough times at school, etc. What we don’t think about is how easily accessible everyone is with some type of social media platform, making things like bullying, talkin’ shit, and just being an overall belittling individual, easy with a few clicks of a button. It’s an underappreciated thing, but it’s so real and so true.

Our hope with this podcast is to spread an array of specific topics, and in particular some that we relate to because we have/are going through or experienced. However, we also raise the topics we raise because we hope to spread an awareness that the kind of information and products out there aren’t what they are portrayed to be. We also want to help areas of peoples’ lives where they think they are the lone wolf. You’re not. We always appreciate other insights, studies, opinions so we can have positive discussion in order to always learn and teach when we are able and to spread the best message possible.

1. Exercise
2. Mental stimulation
3. Spiritual/artistic stimulation meditation
4. Taking a pleasure break with a friend
5. Giving yourself a treat
6. Congratulating yourself
7. Doing a good deed for someone else

I want to focus on the last one, doing a good deed. I believe that this is one of the more important items on the list because not only are you making someone else’s life better and making them feel good about themselves, but it will also give you a sense of happiness.

Throughout the hustle of the day, we often drift toward a tunnel vision of what we ourselves want to accomplish. We have things we want to get done. We have thoughts about things we’re looking forward to. We have worries and stresses.

But the visionary person puts things into perspective. He or she celebrates and is thankful for the great accomplishments of the day. The visionary person takes the bad things and puts things into perspective. Someone will always be having it worse. This is where the daily assist comes into play.

People love to feel important about themselves, and people will always remember you for how you made them feel. Take it upon yourself to go out of your way to do one nice thing for someone else, whether you know them personally or not. This could include:
• Complimenting them on something
• Holding the door for someone or helping them carry something
• Paying for their coffee

The sky is the limit, but one thing will remain the same – you will make someone feel good about themselves. Someone could be having a terrible day, but the 10-15 seconds you took out of your day to do something nice could change the whole course of their day, you never know. Even better, humans have the psychological inclination to pass this along to someone else. Giving the law of reciprocation, when nice is done for someone, they have the psychological urge to return the favor. But because you may never see someone again or it is someone you don’t know, them doing a good deed for someone else they don’t know and passing it on will satisfy the principle.

So, get your daily assist! You never know the chain reaction you could start.

How do you know when you’re ready?

Sometimes you get a pretty clear sign or experience that can guide you into what you need to do. Other times, you’re never really sure. This ‘thing’ can range from a new career path/job, something you’ve never experienced before or place you’ve never been to, etc. If it’s continuously in the back of your mind and you’re envisioning a great experience, trip, career, and you’re envisioning success with that, then you have to do it. Make sure you’re able to live and support yourself if it’s something you need to do for free for a while, but you have to try it. If it’s something you constantly think about and believe you will do well in, you’d be upset with yourself if you didn’t try.

If you try and fail, what’s the worst that can happen? Back where you started? It’s amazing what doors open when you put some energy towards something. Trust me.

Get to a point in your life (soon) where you can take that leap of faith and take it. I think most of your reading this would be upset down the road if you didn’t do it now. Please don’t be that person wishing they had done something. I’m young and feel like I’m late to the party on a few things but my time to start was when it was my time to start. That’s the hardest part, so get it over with.

Say you just bought a high-end exotic car, a Ferrari for the sake of argument. Now that you have one of the top tier vehicles in the world, are you going to fuel it with 87 Unleaded gas, or are you going to put Premium in that bad boy? If you can afford the Ferrari, you can afford better fuel.

The same is true for our bodies. If you eat a balanced diet (we all need to indulge here and there to stay sane) and are consistent with whatever your exercise/nutrition/health goals and nutrition might be, then you’re going to FEEL better. Sure, you’re going to have physical changes that may be to your liking if you eat right and exercise, but we’re aiming to also help you feel better and understand how things work.

When the stomach digests food, it converts the carbohydrates (consisted mostly of sugars and starches) into what is called glucose. Once digested, the glucose is then released into the bloodstream, where it can be used immediately for energy, or stored for a later use. Just like anything, there has to be a good balance. Insulin is made in the pancreas and is released into the bloodstream when glucose levels (eat too many carbs) are high. Insulin tells the cells to essentially ‘open’ in order to let the glucose in, where it is then converted for energy or stored. If glucose is saved for later is, it is stored in larger packages called glycogen, which is stored in the liver and muscles.

People with diabetes have issues with their bodies making insulin, which means glucose cannot enter the cells where/when needed, so glucose levels in the bloodstream rise, leading to hyperglycemia (high blood sugar). When blood sugar levels get high enough, the kidneys try to get rid of the extra sugar through urine. This could make an individual pee more frequently, become thirstier, and lose energy.

On average, blood sugar levels could be between 70-120 milligrams per deciliter. They may spike right after a meal and then drop back down a couple hours later, but it is important to maintain a healthy level of everything from sugar to insulin. Keep a very well-balanced diet, consistent exercise and mobility training, but don’t forget to also live your life, just be more aware of the type of foods we’re putting in our bodies. Do you want to drive a flawless Ferrari or a ’77 Pinto?

"People value what they perceive and choose to see."

This sent me on a spiral. I immediately began to think through why people see the world in a different way, and why they see it that way - it's because of what they value. You can even use this as a tool in regular conversation.

When people either see something, or think of something, that they care about, their eyes will light up, and their pupils will get bigger. It is a psychological fact that the eyes and pupils will dilate when aroused by something of positive memory or influence. They perceive the world in a positive way when talking or focusing on certain things, so the eyes will give a glimpse into that. In an influencing arena, when you see this is in someone that you're talking to, it is a key thing to drill into.

Talk in terms of other people's interests, and they will love talking to you forever. Be curious and find that thing that will light their eyes up. Talk about things people will value and perceive.

But what does it mean to actually be qualified for a position? When you look at the job listing, there are many bullets that list out the job responsibilities and what you will be expected to do. The most common mistake that people make is assuming that they need to be an expert at all these things on the day of the interview. This is where the nervousness comes out.

But I firmly believe that the person who wins over the interviewer is not always the person who is most qualified for the technical skills that go with the position. It is the candidate that is the best fit for the company, its culture, and the overall goals it wants to achieve.

Companies are looking for people who have a personality and work ethic that aligns with what the company itself represents. You are not expected to know everything about the position the first day. But you are expected to be a problem solver, and come to work everyday with the motivation to learn more and develop into a better team member than you were the day before.

You will be more valuable to the growth of a company if you come in with a mindset to master the position, make it better, and then help grow and lead the people around you. The person with that vision is a lot more indispensable than someone who is better at following the instructions for what the job entails.

As you prepare for your next interview, consider these things:

• Look up the mission and values of a company. Match these qualities with yourself and your personality, and tell of experiences or stories where you have showed this before.
• Bring thoughtful questions about the position you are going for - ask about what you can do in the first few weeks to grow and develop within the position.

Take a genuine interest in the interviewer and ask about his or her experience with the company. This will give you an experience of what how that person has developed and grown with the company.

Setting goals because of the lessons that they teach you will reinvest powerful tools in yourself that material things cannot. Skills and experienced gained during your triumphs will reinforce a belief that you have what it takes to reach something even higher.

When mapping out your goals, list out skills and lessons that you want to learn in the process. Once you have reached your goals, write out everything you learned and how you will use it in the future to accomplish something greater. Write down other, unexpected things you learned and how you will also apply these things.

Yes, having the money and the freedom to spend will be nice, but think about the intangible things you took away, and how that will allow you to make more money and set even higher goals.

Think of people who run every single day. Most runners are fairly skinny, with not much in the way of muscle mass. That is because the body doesn’t require as much muscle for that particular activity and has adapted to become efficient as such.

So what do we do? We weight train! Weigh training sends signals to the body that it needs to get stronger, so that is what the body focuses on, rather than trying to burn less calories. More muscle requires more calories. Now with that being said, it’s not wise to enhance exercise and start restricting calories. Your metabolism must remain healthy and with normal functions, but this is part in why weight training helps in various and very beneficial ways with regards to fat loss. Regularly changing up exercise routines will also help to keep this process consistent. This is not the meathead part of me trying to force people to lift and get HUGE. No not at all, but weights are not just for those trying to ‘bulk,’ but they have benefits for all types of people with all types of goals and I think they are frequently overlooked.

Now I’m not saying to never do cardio. There are still benefits to cardio, such as stronger heart and lungs. Sometimes I enjoy a more cardio-based activity, but it is very inconsistent in my personal regiment because that is not my focus. This post is to highlight the fact that including weight training as a focus with a side of cardio has been shown to be a more effective way to reduce fat loss.

Regardless of your goals, some movement is better than no movement, but understanding the effects your chosen activities can have on your body is important as well. Add a little spice to your workouts with some weight activities and you might be pleased with the results you see. What’s the worst that can happen?

• 80% of the value of the relationships that we have comes from 20% of the relationships.
• We devote much less than 80% of our time, attention, and effort to the 20% of our relationships that creat   80% of the value. 

It’s important to meet new people and expand our networks, but it is even more important to take a closer look at the amount of time we’re spending with people, and the quality of people we are spending our time with. When doing this, ask yourself these two questions:

• How does this relationship improve my life and make me happier?
• How does this relationship make me feel better about what I want to become?

You will soon realize that when you answer these questions, 80% of this value comes from a small percentage of your relationships. You will also realize that you aren’t allocating a lot of your existing time to fostering these valuable relationships, much less than 80% of your time that you spend with people. After asking yourself these questions, it’s crucial to be conscious of the 5 elements that are present in a healthy relationship – these include

• Mutual enjoyment of each other’s company
• Respect
• Sharing of experience
• Reciprocity
• Trust

Once you have answered the two questions and have defined which relationships brings the most out of these 5 areas, make a conscious effort to nurture these relationships and treat these as an extension of yourself. When it comes to success, you cannot do it on your own. Alliances with your mentors, mentees, or fellow peers will give you the empowerment to make success for yourself. The different roles you play in these relationships, and the insights that they will bring through shared experience, respect, and trust, are equally important to any other type of self-investment. It is amazing how much more enjoyment you will have in reaching your success when you have these types of people along the way. It will also be remarkable how much quicker and efficient you will be in achieving your short and long-term goals with people who keep you accountable.

Anxiety is one of the most common mental illnesses, affecting 18.1% over the age of 18 in the U.S. annually. Typically, anxiety can be caused by genetics, brain chemistry, personality, and certain life events.

I remember my freshman year of college, my academic advisor told me I had anxiety, and this was about 4 years before I went through my lowest point of depression and anxiety after I was already in the ‘adult world.’ Oh, I switched academic advisors by the way…

As many are aware, it’s very common for depression to coincide with anxiety, and vice-versa. One of those, ‘kick ya while you’re down’ type of deals. Depression is also caused by genes and life changes, but mostly some particular personal experience, past or present.

This may not come as quite the shock, but there is a strong connection between these mental illnesses and suicide. Depression has been reported as affecting nearly 5-8% of Americans ages 18 and older. It has also been associated with being a commonality in almost 50% of suicide deaths, and in up to 75% of alcoholic related suicide deaths.

Now there are those that say your mindset is everything. Yes, that’s true, and I believe that with a lot of things, but I also think that when some type of external factor (another person, relationship, friendship, loss, tragic event) has done most of the damage, you have to go through to get out, and simply telling yourself you’re happy might not do the trick. I’ve been in bad moods because I had thoughts about something long ago that made me angry again, then came to and realized I didn’t need to be thinking about that because I had no reason to, and was fine. However, with my lowest points and my battle with anxiety and depression during that time, lots of external forces and my own demons came to fight that one.

If you suffer from anxiety, depression, or both, please talk to someone. It certainly doesn’t have to be a therapist, your immediate family, or any family for that matter. If it’s your best friend, the aunt/uncle that’s not blood, but kinda is, or whoever you’re drawn to, tell them. They will listen. I promise you, it’s the last thing you want to admit, but it’s worth it. There’s nothing that someone can say or do that will really ‘help.’ I’ve not seen a therapist to date, but am financially planning to do so as I type this. So he or she could offer someone tremendous help, since they specialize in this kind of thing, but if you’re not ready for that, I wanted to help emphasize the next best thing, which is at least a baby step.

We’re all here together, so let’s talk about it and help each other. This isn’t a joke, this is part of real life. And the more and more bullshit that comes out on the internet, it might only get worse. Stay on your own journey, whatever you want it to be, and stay strong. It all works out.